Unfortunately not all marriages last, and sometimes children have to suffer through their parents’ breakup. This can be hard on children of all ages, and often parents – who are having a difficult time dealing with their own emotions – are at a loss as to how to minimize the negative impact on their children. Here are some tips for how to make the transition easier for the whole family. If you have questions about parenting through divorce and need help immediately contact Kansas City divorce attorney Anthony Moreno
1. As much as possible, create a routine and stick to it.
Divorce can be a confusing and unsettling process for children, and they need as much stability as possible to get through it. Having predictable schedules (such a set bedtime, Mondays and Tuesdays with Mom, Wednesdays and Thursdays with Dad) can help them feel as if their whole lives are not spiraling out of control.
2. Make sure children have an outlet for their feelings.
Children have a lot of feelings and concerns during a divorce, and often they are not comfortable being completely honest about them with Mom and Dad because they realize that Mom and Dad are dealing with their own problems. A therapist or another objective third party (such as a teacher, pastor, or family friend) can be a great help during this time. Offering children a safe place where they can freely share any feelings or worries can help them deal with stress in a healthy way, instead of keeping their feelings bottled up inside, which often manifests as bad behavior later. If you have questions and need help immediately contact Kansas City divorce attorney Anthony Moreno.
3. Start new family traditions.
One of the most difficult aspects of divorce for kids is losing family activities they looked forward to. Be sure to come up with new, fun traditions to take their place. Did you have an annual trip to Disney World when you were married? This summer, try taking a single parent vacation with them to a new destination where you can make new memories. Try new restaurants or new recipes, find new parks to visit. Instead of rehashing painful memories show them that their new lives will be full of double the new memories, and make it an adventure instead of a dreaded chore. If you have questions about parenting through the divorce and need help immediately contact Kansas City divorce attorney Anthony Moreno.
4. Put the children first.
This may seem obvious to any parent, but when you are dealing with a devastating blow, it is easy to get caught up in your own emotions and lose sight of the fact that your children are suffering just as much, if not more than, you. When they are at school or with the other parent, you can cry, live in your sweats, fall apart, and vent to your friends and family. But when they are with you, put on a brave face. Be present, talk to them, cuddle with them, do fun things with them, and most importantly don’t fight with or badmouth your ex. Children don’t need the extra stress of being caught in the middle of a war zone so if you and your ex-spouse are not getting along, keep the peace in front of the children, and save the drama for when they are not within earshot. It’s okay to let children know that you are hurting, but show them by example that just because life is not perfect does not mean that it is over; this lesson will serve them well for their entire lives.
5. Divorce is a difficult time, but it can also be an exciting time of new opportunities and fresh starts.
Keep the right perspective, lead your children by example, and you can get through this challenging time together. If you have questions about parenting through the divorce and need help immediately contact Kansas City divorce attorney Anthony Moreno.
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